July 28, 2006

Guess I Missed Happy Hour

To the new mom who came in 20 minutes LATE tonight to get her baby:

Just to let you know - for future reference... I have a heightened sense of smell. I've had it for some time now. It was brought on by many ex boyfriends lying to me about the fact that they ALL were alcoholics. They were amazed by my smelling ability because they had all tried brushing their teeth 20 times, eating tins of Altoids, and drinking Listerine by the pint - only to get busted by my awesome sensory skills. The fact remains, I can smell booze a mile a way. So to you dear mommy... Just to let ya know...
Taking a shower in skanky perfume on the way to my house does not cover up the fact that you obviously got off work early and went out for drinks. But it's nice to know early on in our daycare relationship that you're the kind of mom who would rather be sitting in a smokey bar having drinks with your co-workers (who you see ALL week) than to make sure that you get to daycare to pick your child up on time. Especially since today was only the second day of your child being in daycare. I guess you're a free woman now. You've spent enough time chained to your kid. I mean he IS four months old, your obligation should be lessened now. Because you have me!