February 23, 2006

Happy Birthday T1! ~ My Big 12 Year Old

What can I say...it's been a great 12 years babe!!
I love you, I love you, I love you!!
You're my big boy! You've been there with me through it ALL! Leaving your father, moving to a different state and starting over on our own, staying up late with me watching Lifetime when I was preggers with your brother... (You poor thing, I'm sorry for exposing you to The Golden Girls at such a young formative age!! - Is that why you wanted a cheesecake for your birthday last year?) Anyway, it just seems like you've always been there (for/with) me. We were laying in bed a couple nights ago...(this time watching Nick at Night, not Lifetime...) and I just started laughing out loud. You asked me why I was laughing and I said "because in a few days I will have a 12 year old!" That is so funny to me. I can't believe I have a 12 yr old!! And boy...what a great 12 yr old I have!! You're the best. Period! There is no other 12 yr old better than you! I can't believe 12 yrs ago tonight, at this very moment, 9:47 pm, you were only 45 minutes old. WOW what I would give to go back! Ok, so maybe I'd add a couple weeks to that...you know with the C-section recovery and all...but still, I would give anything to go back! Just for a minute, just to hold your little body in my arms again. Just to smell your little baby smell. Ok, now I'm sitting here bawling and you're on the couch playing your new Gameboy SP and you're going to look over here and figure out I'm writing about you. I hope you read this tomorrow and I hope you know how much you're loved. How much I deeply, truly, LOVE you!! With all my heart!! You're my first love! My first true love! You are the one who gave me my favorite title in all the world..."MOM"! So thank you... thank you for that title! I love it and I cherish it, even if I don't live up to everything that title should stand for on a daily basis! And thanks for forgiving me for all those days that I didn't do a good job of living up to that title! You're a good kid!! Even if I wasn't your mother, I would STILL want to know you!! Ok, bawling again...just tell me this... how did I get so lucky? Not only do I love you because I'm your mother and I have to, I love you because you're fun to be around! You just walked over here, you saw me crying and you just said what I love to hear you say...MOM!! Even if it was in that, "I can't believe she's crying again" voice....like you do when all the sad parts of movies come on. Ok, enough...I don't want you to think I'm depressed because it's your birthday, NO WAY!! Rock on little man, cause we got many more FUN years ahead!! I mean we've only begun...we still have acne, dates, driving, getting you through high school, your first job, college...and we'll stop there. I don't think I can handle thinking about marriage and grandkids!


Pea Pod said...

Aww, what a great post by an enduring, loving mother! You've done a great job raising Ty to 12 years old and I know you'll keep it up!!

Happy Mom Tonja said...

Awww...thank you very much! :o)